Lady Gaga reveals her past brushes with suicide as she opens up about mental trauma of fame

Lady Gaga has long used her massive platform as a modern pop icon to advocate for mental health, the focus of her Born This Way Foundation.

And the 11-time Grammy winner has recently been opening up about her own personal traumas, which inspired her sixth studio album Chromatica.

She revealed her past brushes with suicide Sunday, as she got real about the way fame has affected her mental health, while speaking to Sunday Morning’s Lee Cowan.

Mental health: Lady Gaga revealed her past brushes with suicide Sunday, as she got real about the way fame has affected her mental health, while speaking to Sunday Morning’s Lee Cowan

The 34-year-old said she contemplated suicide daily: ‘I didn’t really understand why I should live other than to be there for my family. That was an actual real thought and feeling: “Why should I stick around?”‘

She added of her depression: ‘It’s not always easy, if you have mental issues, to let other people see. I used to show. I used to self-harm. I used to say, “Look. I cut myself. See, I’m hurt.” Cause I didn’t think anyone could see. Cause mental health, it’s invisible.’

Gaga (whose real name is Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta) also opened up about the mental trauma that comes with fame, while showing off her at-home recording studio.  

She said: ‘This is the piano I’ve had for so many years. I’ve written so many songs on this piano. And I think, “Oh my gosh, it’s so special, this piano, I love this piano.” I don’t know how to explain.

Suicidal thoughts: The 34-year-old said she contemplated suicide daily: 'I didn't really understand why I should live other than to be there for my family. That was an actual real thought and feeling: "Why should I stick around?"'

Suicidal thoughts: The 34-year-old said she contemplated suicide daily: ‘I didn’t really understand why I should live other than to be there for my family. That was an actual real thought and feeling: “Why should I stick around?”‘

Hiding the pain: She added of her depression: 'It’s not always easy, if you have mental issues, to let other people see. I used to show. I used to self-harm. I used to say, "Look. I cut myself. See, I’m hurt." Cause I didn’t think anyone could see. Cause mental health, it’s invisible'

Hiding the pain: She added of her depression: ‘It’s not always easy, if you have mental issues, to let other people see. I used to show. I used to self-harm. I used to say, “Look. I cut myself. See, I’m hurt.” Cause I didn’t think anyone could see. Cause mental health, it’s invisible’

Own worst enemy: Gaga (whose real name is Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta) added: 'I went from looking at this piano and thinking, "You ruined my life!" I was like, "You made me Lady Gaga. My biggest enemy is Lady Gaga!"' (pictured in August, 2020)

Own worst enemy: Gaga (whose real name is Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta) added: ‘I went from looking at this piano and thinking, “You ruined my life!” I was like, “You made me Lady Gaga. My biggest enemy is Lady Gaga!”‘ (pictured in August, 2020)

Behind the lyrics: She also explained the lyrics to her song 911, for which she recently dropped the music video: '"Pop a 911," that's a reference to the medication that I have to take when I used to panic because I'm Lady Gaga'

Behind the lyrics: She also explained the lyrics to her song 911, for which she recently dropped the music video: ‘”Pop a 911,” that’s a reference to the medication that I have to take when I used to panic because I’m Lady Gaga’

‘I went from looking at this piano and thinking, “You ruined my life!” I was like, “You made me Lady Gaga. My biggest enemy is Lady Gaga!”‘

The Born This Way artist continued: ‘That’s what I was thinking. My biggest enemy is here. “What did you do? You can’t go to the grocery store now. If you go to dinner with your family, somebody comes to the table… It’s always about you. And your outfits, look at your outfits! Why you gotta be like that?!”‘

She also explained the lyrics to her song 911, for which she recently dropped the music video: ‘”Pop a 911,” that’s a reference to the medication that I have to take when I used to panic because I’m Lady Gaga.’

Gaga added of Chromatica: ‘There’s not one song on that record that’s not true. Not one. I totally gave up on myself, I hated being famous. I hated being a star. I felt exhausted and used up.’

But she’s since found a way through her depression, thanks to her latest album, which recently won her three MTV Video Music Awards. 

Used up: Gaga added of Chromatica: 'There's not one song on that record that's not true. Not one. I totally gave up on myself, I hated being famous. I hated being a star. I felt exhausted and used up'

Used up: Gaga added of Chromatica: ‘There’s not one song on that record that’s not true. Not one. I totally gave up on myself, I hated being famous. I hated being a star. I felt exhausted and used up’

Winner winner: But she's since found a way through her depression, thanks to her latest album, which recently won her three MTV Video Music Awards (pictured in August, 2020)

Winner winner: But she’s since found a way through her depression, thanks to her latest album, which recently won her three MTV Video Music Awards (pictured in August, 2020)

Friendship goals: She's also forged a true friendship with Rain On Me collaborator Ariana Grande, 27: 'I love that girl. You know how hard it is to make a female friend in this business? In this business, having a female friend is like watching a pig fly'

Friendship goals: She’s also forged a true friendship with Rain On Me collaborator Ariana Grande, 27: ‘I love that girl. You know how hard it is to make a female friend in this business? In this business, having a female friend is like watching a pig fly’

The Stupid Love artist said: ‘I don’t hate Lady Gaga anymore. I found a way to love myself again, even when I thought that was never gonna happen.

‘Now I look at this piano and I go, “Oh, my god, my piano! My piano that I love so much; my piano that lets me speak; my piano that lets me make poetry; my piano that’s mine.”‘ 

In addition to the therapeutic outlet Chromatica has offered, she’s also forged a true friendship with Rain On Me collaborator Ariana Grande, 27.

She gushed over her new pal: ‘I love that girl. You know how hard it is to make a female friend in this business? In this business, having a female friend is like watching a pig fly.’

Gaga previously touched on her mental health struggles in making Chromatica, telling Apple Music in May: ‘I’ve flirted with the idea of sobriety. I’m not there yet, but I flirted with it throughout the album. It’s something that came up as a result of me trying to work through the pain that I was feeling.

‘But part of my healing process was going, “Well, I can either lash the hell out of myself every day for continuing to drink, or I can just be happy that I’m still alive and keep going and feel good enough.” I am good enough… I’m perfectly imperfect.’

Flirting with sobriety: Gaga previously touched on her mental health struggles in making Chromatica, telling Apple Music in May: 'I've flirted with the idea of sobriety. I'm not there yet, but I flirted with it throughout the album'

Flirting with sobriety: Gaga previously touched on her mental health struggles in making Chromatica, telling Apple Music in May: ‘I’ve flirted with the idea of sobriety. I’m not there yet, but I flirted with it throughout the album’