Lily Allen has lamented ‘neglecting’ her two daughters during her previous battle with drug addition and financial woes.
The Smile songstress, 35, shares daughters Ethel, nine, and Marnie, eight, with her ex Sam Cooper, and back in 2014, when the family faced money troubles Lily was forced to go on tour with Miley Cyrus, supporting her Bangerz Tour.
As she spoke to DJ Fat Tony on his The Recovery podcast, Lily admitted that she was not in the right head space to go away from her young daughters and when she went she began abusing drink and drugs drastically.
After seeking help and now living a clean and sober lifestyle, Lily, who is married to Stranger Things actor David Harbour, delightedly gushed over their relationship now that she is no longer substance abusing, as she branded their union ‘gold’.
Her loves: Lily Allen has lamented ‘neglecting’ her two daughters in the past, yet delightedly gushed over their relationship now she is clean and sober (Lily pictured with her husband David Harbour and daughters Ethel, nine, and Marnie, eight, last summer)
Lily has often chronicled her low points in a candid manner, with her 2019 memoir My Thoughts Exactly telling the shocking tales of her rock bottom while her album No Shame goes into stark details about her marital woes and addiction.
She was in a relationship with Sam from 2009 and in October the following year, their son William was stillborn at six months.
Sam and Lily wed in 2011 before their 2018 split, and Lily explained that while they were together she headed on the Bangerz tour as money was beginning to run out for the family – yet she did not feel ready in herself.
The tour visited the Americas, Europe, and Oceania through five legs. It spanned from February 14 to October 23, 2014, and Lily has previously revealed she would use female escorts and take drugs in excess during the tour.
Pained: As she spoke to DJ Fat Tony on his The Recovery podcast , Lily admitted that she was not in the right head space to go away from her young daughters and when she went she began abusing drink and drugs drastically (Lily pictured in 2009)
Speaking about the lead-up to heading off with Miley, she said: ‘ I got married when I was 24 and I had a baby, I had a baby who died 10 years ago this month…
‘And then I went on to have two successful pregnancies and then about six months after my youngest was born we ran out of money and I had to go back out on the road again. But I was 14st and did not feel like a pop star at all…
‘That really keeps me in check and going to meetings regularly. I’ve come to a place of accepting that I can’t really get involved in all of that stuff any more.’
Sweet: The Smile songstress, 35, shares Ethel and Marnie with her ex Sam Cooper (pictured at Glastonbury in 2014)
On tour: After her weight rose to 14st, the 5′ 2″ star began taking a drug similar to speed to shed pounds before the tour, however this send her on a downward spiral and left her debating taking heroin to help her ‘act out’
Lily also weighed in on the impact of her substance abuse on her daughters: ‘It’s really great and I think more than anything I feel like I am in the process of breaking that cycle…
‘I felt so guilty about neglecting my kids in those early years of their lives and having to go off on tour…
‘And misbehaving in the way I was. I really have a great relationship with my kids now. I am there to pick them up at the school gates whenever I can be and I am up dropping them off in the morning and I make them dinner.
‘They come to me when they’ve got problems. That’s golden to me. They are confident little girls and I don’t feel like… Touch wood they are not going to turn into drug addicts! Like I did. They seem like they are on a good path.’
Oh dear: In 2018, she came under fire for glamourising drug-taking after admitting she snorted a line of ketamine at the Glamour Woman Of The Year Awards in 2008 (pictured)
She sang about feeling resentment for Sam in her song Apples, with the lyrics: ‘I felt like I was only good for writing the cheques’, while touching on her guilt about leaving her children in her heartbreaking song Three, also from No Shame.
Singing from her daughters’ points of view, she sang: ‘I’ve been out making lots of friends, You can’t play with us, ’cause you’re always off on tour. One day I hope you meet them. Please don’t go. Stay here with me.’
On her relationship with husband David Harbour, she said: ‘I am in a really happy relationship. A really healthy relationship…
‘He is sober, he has been Sober for 20 years now – we are thinking of what we are going to do with the rest of our lives…
‘I feel a sense of… I felt like I really had to prove people wrong in the past and that people had all these preconceptions of who I was whereas now I get to wake up in the morning and interact with my children and them feel loved and protected…
Speaking out: On other people’s opinions on her life, Lily said: ‘And it hasn’t always felt like that, even although from the outside people would say you’ve got loads of money and you’re really successful what have you got to complain about’ (pictured in 2008)
‘And then i can go off and do my work. It doesn’t have to be a number one single. It’s not a failure if it isn’t a number one single. I am just lucky that I am able to be able to do this and I get sent the odd designer handbag. Life is good.’
On other people’s opinions on her life, Lily said: ‘And it hasn’t always felt like that, even although from the outside people would say you’ve got loads of money and you’re really successful what have you got to complain about..
‘I had everything to complain about because I felt so fucking miserable. Now I don’t have as much as I had then in terms of success and wealth but i have success and health in my head which is more valuable I think.
Happy and healthy: On her relationship with husband David Harbour, she said: ‘I am in a really happy relationship. A really healthy relationship’