Billie Eilish reveals she is ‘ashamed’ of her past after racial slur scandal

Billie Eilish has revealed she feels ‘ashamed’ about her past actions surfacing online. 

In a new interview with Vogue Australia, the 19-year-old pop superstar said that everyone has an ’embarrassing’ past – including her.    

‘It’s really weird how the world can see every aspect of your life and reminisce about [it]. It’s so weird,’ the Bad Guy singer said. 

Behind her: Billie Eilish has revealed she feels ‘ashamed’ about her past actions surfacing online. In a new interview with Vogue Australia, the 19-year-old pop superstar said that everyone has an ’embarrassing’ past – including her. Pictured in Vogue Australia

‘The internet brings up things from everybody’s past and I’m like: “Don’t you guys understand that everybody is incredibly embarrassed and ashamed about their past?” 

‘Like, do you not think about the fact that maybe you’re embarrassed of your past, so maybe everybody else is embarrassed, too?’

The performer, who also stars in a stunning fashion shoot in this month’s issue of the magazine, added that she has changed her mind on many of her past views. 

Open: 'The internet brings up things from everybody's past and I'm like: "Don't you guys understand that everybody is incredibly embarrassed and ashamed about their past?" 'Like, do you not think about the fact that maybe you're embarrassed of your past, so maybe everybody else is embarrassed, too?' she told the publication

Open: ‘The internet brings up things from everybody’s past and I’m like: “Don’t you guys understand that everybody is incredibly embarrassed and ashamed about their past?” ‘Like, do you not think about the fact that maybe you’re embarrassed of your past, so maybe everybody else is embarrassed, too?’ she told the publication 

‘I said so many things then that I totally don’t agree with now, or think the opposite thing,’ she admitted. 

‘The weirdest thing is how nothing ever goes away once it’s on the internet. Every interview I did when I was 15 is still out there, and I think about it constantly.’    

The comments come after Billie said that she was ’embarrassed and appalled’ last month when a video of her when she was a younger teen emerged on TikTok, showing her mouthing a racist slur.

In a statement on Instagram, Billie said she was being ‘labeled some thing that [she’s] not’ in connection with the old clips. 

Updated: The performer, who also stars in a stunning fashion shoot in this month's issue of the magazine, added that she has changed her mind on many of her past views. 'I said so many things then that I totally don't agree with now, or think the opposite thing,' she admitted. 'The weirdest thing is how nothing ever goes away once it's on the internet. Every interview I did when I was 15 is still out there, and I think about it constantly'

Updated: The performer, who also stars in a stunning fashion shoot in this month’s issue of the magazine, added that she has changed her mind on many of her past views. ‘I said so many things then that I totally don’t agree with now, or think the opposite thing,’ she admitted. ‘The weirdest thing is how nothing ever goes away once it’s on the internet. Every interview I did when I was 15 is still out there, and I think about it constantly’

‘There’s a video edit going around of me when I was 13 or 14 where I’m mouthed the word for the song that at the time I didn’t know it was a derogatory term used against members of the Asian community,’ she wrote on Instagram. ‘I am appalled and embarrassed I want to barf that I ever mouth belong to that word.

‘This song was the only time I’ve ever heard that word as it was never used around me by anyone and my family. Regardless of my ignorance and age at the time, nothing excuses the fact that it was hurtful. And for that I am sorry.’

She also addressed a second clip that showed her appearing to mock an Asian accent. 

Apologizing: Last month, Billie said she was 'embarrassed and appalled' after a video of her when she was a younger teen emerged on TikTok, that showed her mouthing a racist slur

Apologizing: Last month, Billie said she was ’embarrassed and appalled’ after a video of her when she was a younger teen emerged on TikTok, that showed her mouthing a racist slur 

The Lovely performer said, ‘The other video that edited clip is me speaking a silly gibberish made up voice … something I started doing as a kid and I’ve done my whole life when talking to my pets, friends and family. It’s absolutely gibberish and just me goofing around and it is NO way in imitation of anyone or any language, accent, or culture in the SLIGHTEST.’

Billie said that anyone who knows her is aware that ‘goofing around with [her] voice is [her] whole life.’  

She added that the negative response ‘breaks [her] heart’ because she wouldn’t want people to be hurt by her, even if it was due to a misinterpretation.

Shocking: Viewers were outraged by the clips

Uncomfortable scenes: A second clip shows Billie appearing to mock an Asian accent, though she said it was a made-up gibberish voice she’s used since she was a child

‘Regardless of how it was interpreted I did not mean for any of my actions to have caused hurt to others and now it absolutely breaks my heart that it is being labeled now in a way that might cause pain to people hearing it,’ she said. ‘I not only believe in, but I’ve always worked hard to use my platform to fight for inclusion, kindness, tolerance, equity and equality.’

She concluded by writing, ‘We all need to continue having conversations listening and learning. I hear you and I love you, thank you for taking the time to read this.’

Some fans defended her, saying the video might be related to her Tourette syndrome, which she admitted having in 2018, though she said it only manifests in physical tics, not verbal noises.

Pain: 'Regardless of how it was interpreted I did not mean for any of my actions to have caused hurt to others and now it absolutely breaks my heart that it is being labeled now in a way that might cause pain to people hearing it,' she said

Pain: ‘Regardless of how it was interpreted I did not mean for any of my actions to have caused hurt to others and now it absolutely breaks my heart that it is being labeled now in a way that might cause pain to people hearing it,’ she said