If you’ve ever found yourself wistfully dreaming about living solo, you wouldn’t be alone – and growing numbers of married couples are taking that fleeting fantasy a step further and choosing to Live Apart Together (LAT).
Recent research revealed 24 per cent of UK couples are happily wed but living in separate homes – with LAT even boasting celebrities among its devotees.
Gwyneth Paltrow and husband Brad Falchuck live together just four days a week, while actress Helena Bonham Carter and film director Tim Burton famously lived in separate but interconnected properties in London for more than a decade.
Living Apart Together may well be the secret to a long and happy marriage, but the financial and legal implications of the arrangement are often overlooked.
Elspeth Kinder, a partner at JMW Solicitors, is one of the UK’s leading divorce lawyers and has handled hundreds of cases, many involving unorthodox living arrangements.
Here, speaking exclusively to FEMAIL, Elspeth lists the potential pitfalls married couples should watch out for before choosing to Live Apart Together:
Elspeth Kinder (pictured), a partner at JMW Solicitors, is one of the UK’s leading divorce lawyers and has handled hundreds of cases, many involving unorthodox living arrangements
Prenups aren’t just for celebs
Pre-nups get a bad rap for being ‘unromantic’, but that couldn’t be further from the truth.
A well-drafted agreement helps couples to protect their individual interests and, where unusual living arrangements are involved like Living Apart Together, it forces couples to have difficult conversations which otherwise might not be had.
For LAT couples, it’s even more important that those discussions take place, outlining what each expects from the other. It’s a great opportunity to discuss and agree how an LAT lifestyle will work in practice.
How much time will each spend visiting the other, for example, and will the travelling be evenly split?
If the agreed arrangements then change during the course of the marriage, the prenup may prove invaluable in the event of a divorce – while not legally binding, the court will look to uphold the agreement if it has been fairly entered into with the benefit of legal advice and there has been an open discussion about each person’s financial circumstances before the agreement is signed.
Living Apart Together may well be the secret to a long and happy marriage, but the financial and legal implications of the arrangement are often overlooked and can result in problems between a couple (stock photo)
Separating assets won’t protect them if you split
The idea that keeping assets separate will be of benefit in the event of a split is as fictitious as the belief that assets are routinely split 50/50.
The act of getting married creates a legal agreement, regardless of your living arrangements, with the Matrimonial Causes Act 1973 setting out how assets are treated on divorce.
The court will assess the assets available to meet the needs of both parties and any children.
Whilst the court will consider how to fairly treat an asset that is pre-marital, inherited or acquired during the marriage, if one party’s needs can only be met by recourse to a non-matrimonial asset then that may be the inevitable solution imposed by the court.
LAT couples shouldn’t assume that separating their home, bank accounts and possessions will protect those assets should the marriage end – though ring-fencing them as part of a prenuptial agreement may carry weight in the court.
For example, if a husband and wife had maintained separation of their living arrangements and their bank accounts, but the wife was the wealthier of the two and so had paid for things like eating out, holidays, clothes and leisure activities, then it could be claimed that she has created a dependency.
The wealthier party could claim that the fact that all assets are separate is a determining factor, but it’s a conundrum for the court to decide and certainly isn’t clean cut.
Tackle tough tasks when the sun shines
Talking about death isn’t top of the list for most newlyweds, but couples should have unpleasant conversations when the sun shines.
While running two homes – and sometimes separate finances – might be the ticket to a happy marriage, it poses potential pitfalls when it comes to distributing assets after death. Untangling finances will be much more straightforward with a Will in place.
As the couple ages and perhaps one needs a carer or they consider selling one home to pay for care, it’s important that financial implications have been assessed, with a clear plan of action in place.
Don’t get stuck in an LAT “rut”
Couples who have always Lived Apart Together but have decided to separate should avoid delay when it comes to getting legal advice and making things official.
The court may not consider the marriage to have ended simply when the decision was made, meaning that changes to the value of assets – whether an increase or decrease in value, or a business taking off, for example – may be taken into account when agreeing the financial settlement.
If a couple split, maintaining separate homes and separate finances, only getting divorced years down the line, additional assets gained during that time could be up for grabs.
Living Apart Together can be a fulfilling lifestyle choice, but couples should take care to protect their individual interests when times are good, making things easier should the worst happen.