Lacey Turner has admitted she ‘ignored’ the fact she was pregnant as she felt ‘numb’ after suffering two miscarriages.
Appearing on Thursday’s episode of Loose Women, the EastEnders star, 31, reflected on her journey to motherhood after welcoming daughter Dusty in July with husband Matt Kay.
The actress refused to acknowledge her third pregnancy until she was 14 weeks along, and even then would not allow herself to get excited until she reached the 25 week mark.
Numbed: Lacey Turner has admitted she ‘ignored’ the fact she was pregnant as she felt ‘numb’ after suffering two miscarriages
Discussing getting pregnant for the third time, Lacey revealed: ‘It took us ages to get pregnant. I put so much pressure on myself to fall pregnant and it wasn’t happening.
‘It got to the point where I said to Matt, “Let’s just forget it. We’ll get a puppy.” As soon as we’d said that, we fell pregnant.’
Revealing she had a scan ‘every week’ during her pregnancy with Dusty, she explained: ‘I was so scared. Until you feel kicking, you don’t know if anything is actually there.
I always thought, “This might not work,” I just became really laid back about the whole thing. I just felt numb to the whole thing.’
Adorable: Appearing on Loose Women, the EastEnders star, 31, reflected on her journey to motherhood after welcoming daughter Dusty in July with husband Matt Kay
Before she fell pregnant with Dusty, Lacey suffered two miscarriages, and admitted she didn’t know ‘how’ to grieve the loss.
Discussing her first pregnancy, she recalled: ‘You start thinking about baby names and looking at clothes and things, and then it was just sort of gone… at seven weeks.
‘It was such a massive shock as quite naively I thought, “I’m going to have a baby”…
Held back: The actress refused to acknowledge her third pregnancy until she was 14 weeks along, and even then would not allow herself to get excited until she reached the 25 week mark
Struggle: Discussing getting pregnant for the third time, Lacey revealed, ‘It took us ages to get pregnant. I put so much pressure on myself to fall pregnant and it wasn’t happening’
Reflection: Discussing her first pregnancy, she recalled, ‘You start thinking about baby names and looking at clothes and things, and then it was just sort of gone… at seven weeks’
‘It’s so hard, what do you say to people? I don’t want them to feel uncomfortable about it. Although I felt so heartbroken, I just thought “I’ll brush that under the rug”…
‘It’s hard because, are you supposed to grieve for something that’s the size of a grain of rice? People believe different things, but for me it was a baby from the minute it was conceived.’
She went on to say she and Matt tried again and she sadly miscarried a second time: ‘Although I was more prepared, it was more of a kick in the stomach, because it hadn’t worked the second time.
‘I thought, “What do I do now?” Is there something wrong, is this going to take us years?’
Amazing: Discussing the birth of Dusty, Lacey revealed, ‘It was amazing. I had the most unbelievable birth’
Speedy: Lacey said of her labour, ‘I woke up with a tummy ache at two, went to hospital at three.. Had her at quarter to nine and I was home by half five, cleaning my house’
Lacey is currently on maternity leave from her role as Stacey Fowler in EastEnders and enjoying life as a new mum.
Discussing the birth of Dusty, Lacey revealed: ‘It was amazing. I had the most unbelievable birth.
‘I woke up with a tummy ache at two, went to hospital at three.. Had her at quarter to nine and I was home by half five, cleaning my house…. We were on cloud nine.’
For support with the loss of a child contact The Miscarriage Association on 01924 200 799 or www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk
Happy family: Lacey and her husband Matt Kay are the proud parents of seven month old baby daughter Dusty