Body language expert Louise Mahler shares how to appear more confidence on a first date

You should sit with your back straight, maintain eye contact and control your breathing in order to appear more confident on a first date, a body language expert has revealed.

Louise Mahler, Body Language Expert and SmileDirectClub Australian Confidence Council Member, told FEMAIL confidence can be learnt by paying close attention to how you behave.

‘First impressions are made in a tenth of a second, which means on a first date we have to grab the opportunity immediately,’ she said.

‘Enter the room with your head held high, a big wide smile and walking with your arms swinging beside you freely showing confidence and openness’

During a date, she also recommends taking note if your date ‘mirrors’ you by mimicking your gestures, as this could indicate they’re into you.

1. Stand tall and straighten your back

First, Louise emphasised the importance of standing tall and sitting with your back straight upon meeting and during your date.

‘Nothing says confidence more than a fully energised upright body; what you want to avoid is bending or leaning forward as this mimics heading towards the foetal position, sending a message of fear and the need for “protection”,’ she said.

Instead, try to keep your back straight and shoulders ‘wide’ and walk with your arms swinging slightly.

This makes it seem like you’re free, confident and ‘open to new opportunities’. 

2. Control your breathing  

Since first dates can be quite daunting and stressful, attempt to control your breathing and stay calm.

Louise said when we’re stressed our breath tends to rise the tension in the chest and neck, making you look scared, worried or awkward.

‘The place we should experience the breath to help keep us calm is below the ribs, so keep your focus on keeping your breath low, your shoulders down and harness the power of the exhale to ensure you keep the air flowing,’ she said.

3. Maintain eye contact

Making eye contact will not only make your date know you are interested in what they have to say, but will also make you appear confident.

Lousie said: ‘Eye contact is a discipline we all need to learn. In general, we want our eyes to rove all over the place, but that will not be helpful on a first date.

‘Looking into the eyes of your date is essential as the eyes are literally the window to our soul.’

She added that maintaining a permanent focus may seem ‘strange’ but simple be aware of your wandering eye and always bring your attention back to your date.

4. Make sure your body is facing the person speaking

Ensuring your body is facing your date as they speak is another body language ‘hack’ to boost confidence and leave a positive long-lasting impression.

‘When we have our hips and feet facing away from others sending a message of wanting to flee. So, be mindful to look at the angle of your feet and hips and put them directly towards your date,’ Louise said.

‘If you are side by side, this is impossible of course, so turn your body slightly towards them and fold your legs in their direction.’

5. Remember to smile

Louise said simply smiling at someone on a first date will help you come across as someone to connect with, while also showing confidence.

Smiling also releases dopamine, endorphins, and serotonin in your brain – each substance acts as a natural pain reliever and mood elevator that enhances your overall well-being.

New 2022 research from SmileDirectClub found that Australians have a positive impression of people who smile.

The research revealed Aussies believe people who smile at them are welcoming (62 per cent), warm (31 per cent), and confident (29 per cent) – put in simple terms, we like people who smile.

As an added bonus the research revealed that a smile is a top feature (30%) that Australians find most attractive in a person.