Every time I go to Paris – my favourite city – something crazy happens.
In April 2019, I was crossing the Pont au Double bridge when I saw the glorious Notre-Dame cathedral in flames.
On a visit this spring, the city was ablaze with riots – and on my latest trip someone mentioned the dreaded phrase ‘bed bugs’ before I even set foot on the Eurostar.
Thankfully, I didn’t encounter any, but you get the gist – chicness mixed with lots of je ne sais quoi drama. That’s why j’adore Paris – it’s anything but predictable.
In fact, on this latest visit the drama was nonstop.
Joanne Hegarty is wearing a pop of red from Massimo Dutti and Parisian-inspired neutrals: Jacket and trousers, Cos; Bag, Toteme; and Loafers, Gucci
As I was flicking through Vogue on the 7am Eurostar, surrounded by men in suits, an airdropped message from an unknown number popped up on my phone.
When I opened it, I nearly spat out my croissant. It was what’s known as a d**k pic – no face, no words, just a picture of a strange man’s genitalia.
I’ve been out of the dating world a while but what the hell are these about? Is this how men woo women in 2023? Am I meant to be impressed by its size and how many megabytes it took to send? Delete, delete.
On my return journey, Tom Holland and his equally A-list girlfriend Zendaya (185 million followers on Instagram) wandered into the carriage and sat opposite.
I thought I was imagining things but there they were, heading home from Paris Fashion Week.
Zendaya in double Loewe denim baggy jeans and shirt. Her Spider-Man in T-shirt and jeans. Both looked so slight and young and normal.
Amusingly, their much older bodyguard leapt up to follow when the couple wandered off hand in hand trying to locate the loo. ‘Steady!’ Tom cautioned, as Zendaya stumbled in the swaying train.
At St Pancras they left totally unnoticed, she in a headscarf, he in a peaked cap.
Quiet luxury may be another big autumn theme but Paris fashion has always been known for being discreet, says Joanne
One thing that does remain predictable about Paris is how people dress. This season, the much-documented style of Parisian women is one of the biggest trends.
The ballet flat and the Mary Jane, both Parisian staples, take centre stage. Cropped barrel-leg jeans and tailored trousers to show these off are also in vogue, as are cropped bouclé jackets.
Quiet luxury may be another big autumn theme but Paris fashion has always been known for being discreet.
Parisians avoid teaming too many bright colours together. Instead, they opt for neutral tones and classic shades – white, black, navy, grey, beige, burgundy, cognac, khaki – and punctuate the look occasionally with a surprise pop of red.
But then this is the city that constantly loves to surprise. And I love to be surprised. Except by unwanted man spam!
@thestylistandthewardrobe
Cardigan, £27.50, marksandspencer.com
@youmagazine
ON AUTUMN’S KNIT LIST
The cardigan is ruling supreme in the knitwear department this season.
For a chic look, button it up completely and wear it tucked into a skirt with nothing underneath. For stylish options that won’t break the bank check out Marks & Spencer.
TRUE GEMS
Necklace, £365, Stone and Strand, net-a-porter.com
Pearls are back, hence why the fashion set have been rifling through family jewellery boxes looking for an heirloom piece.
If that doesn’t work, this pearl offering with your initial is a great alternative.
PINS ON PARADE
Charlotte Gainsbourg paired her evening dress with black sheers at the Palace of Versailles last month
Sheer black tights are another hit this season and I couldn’t be more excited to add these to my winter staples.
Kate Moss and Carla Bruni rocked them front row at the YSL show in Paris in September, their legs encased in 15 denier.
Also last month, French star Charlotte Gainsbourg hit the red carpet at the Palace of Versailles in black sheers. For extra 90s appeal, pair with black court shoes.